Monday, April 12, 2010

RECAP: The Amazing Race - "Dumb Did Us In"


FINALLY. I'm not going to spoil it right away, but I was really happy with the ending of last night's episode of The Amazing Race. Aside from the part that made me stand up and fist pump like I was dancing on the Jersey Shore, the entire episode was actually pretty good. The Detours and the Fast Forward were entertaining and, if not necessarily overly difficult, at least not mind-numbingly easy. There was still a fair bit of stupidity from some of the teams, and the Roadblock was pretty dumb, but all in all it was an enjoyable episode. Read on for the full rundown.

Teams left Penang, Malaysia and travelled to Singapore by way of Kuala Lumpur. Once again, we saw the stupid equalizer, as all teams were allowed to catch up in Kuala Lumpur and catch the same train to Singapore. The Detectives and the Models caught the same bus as the Bros, and Brent, Caite, Michael, and Louie spent some time explaining their hatred of the Lesbians (a hatred I share, but not just because, as Caite puts it, "they're mean"--more on that later). Dan and Jordan seemed surprised that the others wanted to U-Turn Carol and Brandy; the Detectives and the Models have apparently convinced themselves that the Lesbians are a really well-travelled team and therefore have an advantage over everyone else. If this is the case (it's not), Carol and Brandy aren't using their experience to their advantage, as they haven't won a leg yet.

On the train to Singapore, everyone's obnoxious American attitude shone through yet again, as almost every team bitched about how dirty and smelly the train was--Dan actually pulled out some disinfectant wipes and started cleaning the area around him. It's a wonder these teams don't get their asses kicked by locals more often. There was a bit of drama as the teams prepared to leave the train; Carol and Brandy tried to pass everyone to get to the next car, and the other teams refused to let them through, with Brent stating "Ladies get their way, bitches don't." Classy.

The teams had to get to the Victoria Concert Hall and find Allan Wu, the host of The Amazing Race Asia. Everyone but the Cowboys and the Bros ran into the Concert Hall to look for Wu, who was reading a newspaper out in front of the Hall. Dan and Jordan got to him first, and decided to go to the Fast Forward, which required them to ride the Singapore Flyer (basically an enormous ferris wheel), get out at the top, and cross a narrow bridge to the next cab. They did this fairly easily, although Jordan said to Dan when they go to the top: "So maybe now's a good time to tell that I've just discovered I have an intense fear of heights." Despite his fear (and he really looked terrified; he was shaking like a leaf as he crossed the bridge, which was basically just a horizontal ladder), he made it across, and Dan followed him quickly. They got their clue, and went to the Pit Stop, checking in first. Phil told them that they had each won a motorbike, and they responded by telling him that there wasn't a chance that either one of them would ever even step on a motorbike, because their mother would kill them. Uhhh...you guys are in your 20's. Cut the umbilical cord.

The other teams got their clue from Wu, and it was a Detour. Teams had to choose between "Pounding the Drums," in which they had to go to a place called Speaker's Corner and learn a complex drum routine before performing it properly on a huge stage, and "Pounding the Pavement," in which they had to pick up various supplies and ten boxes of ice cream from a truck, then work an ice cream cart and sell 25 Singapore-style ice-cream sandwiches (which apparently are either ice cream between two wafers, or just ice cream wrapped in a piece of bread--uhhh...yum?). Every team initially picked the Drums Detour, as it seemed the quickest, but they quickly learned that it was a lot harder than it sounded. Little children were their drum instructors, and some of the kids were just going way too fast for the teams to be able to learn the routine. The Detectives quickly decided to switch and go for the Fast Forward (with Michael explaining his ineptitude at the drums by saying that he had no rhythm, and was "as white as white can be"), as they assumed that the Brothers had gone to the other Detour. As they left the drum station, Michael thanked his instructor, then said "we're off like a prom dress." Again, classy.

When the Detectives got to the Fast Forward, the attendant wouldn't tell them whether or not another team was already there, so they had to take an elevator up to the Singapore Flyer, thus wasting a fair amount of time (it didn't help that when they came back out, their cab driver had gone to the bathroom, and they had to wait for him to get back). They then headed off to the Ice Cream Detour.

The Cowboys (easily my favourite remaining team) showed the first signs of stress during the entire Race at the Detour, with Jet telling Cord to just be quiet as he tried to get the rhythm of the drums right. Thankfully, their bickering lasted all of 10 seconds before they were back to their lovable selves. They've been consistently likable the entire season, despite making some dumb decisions and saying "Oh my gravy" every thirty seconds during certain episodes. It's refreshing to see a team like that, as most likable teams from each season eventually start snapping at each other--it's understandable given the situation they're in, but it's still disappointing every season when it happens (I'm looking at you, Margie and Luke from season 14). It's incredibly rare for a team to stay positive and supportive for the entire Race; I can only think of one team that's managed to do it (Kris and Jon from season 6), and in my opinion they were one of the most entertaining teams to ever run the Race (although it's possible that's because they were surrounded with some of the most negative, hateful teams ever, and they were just a breath of fresh air).

The Models somehow managed to finish the Drums Detour first, apparently just by counting the number of beats (they can count?!?). They went to the next Clue Box and U-Turned the Lesbians (it wasn't a blind U-Turn this time, so they had to put their own picture up as well). Caite explained that they were doing it because the Lesbians had been mean to her the entire Race. As much as I was glad to see this happen (both because I hate Carol and Brandy and because I didn't want to see the Cowboys get U-Turned), it was probably a poor tactical decision. Being as they didn't know where the Brothers and the Detectives were, the only real choices for the U-Turn were the Cowboys and the Lesbians, and I think the Cowboys are by far the stronger team. Every time they turn around Carol and Brandy are at each other's throats, while the Cowboys are great with challenges and work together really well.

The Detectives arrived at the Ice Cream Detour, and appeared to finish somewhat quickly, mainly because their cab driver showed up when they had sold 15 ice cream sandwiches and bought the remaining ten. The Cowboys finished the Drums Detour last, but they showed up at the Roadblock around the same time as the Detectives, because the Lesbians had to turn back and complete the other side of the Detour.

Carol and Brandy were unsurprised, but furious when they realized that Brent and Caite had U-Turned them, and this is where the show got really ugly for a while. As usual, when things didn't go her way Brandy became a petulant child and started acting really petty. They ranted on and on about how stupid Brent and Caite were, comparing them to Forrest Gump and saying that the reason they had been U-Turned was that one of them (I couldn't tell who was talking) was prettier than Caite...uhhhhh...in what universe? God people say some dumb things when they're angry. They shifted into Super Bicker Mode when they got to the Ice Cream Detour, and stayed that way for almost the rest of the leg.

The Roadblock was pointless, requiring teams to count the links in a giant chain. The "added difficulty" came from the fact that there were a bunch of guys hammering all around them, and some dude was yelling numbers over a loudspeaker, which just seems annoying rather than difficult (Brent kept yelling at everyone to shut up, apparently not realizing that these people are probably being paid to do exactly what they're doing). Despite the distractions, each team finished on the first try. The Detectives lost some ground here, because Michael (who was using a pitch counter from his side-job as a baseball coach to count the links) forgot to write the number down on a clipboard, as instructed by the clue card. I'm always intrigued by the fact that virtually every season there are teams that don't read their clues correctly and end up doing a challenge wrong because of it--I understand you're in a hurry, but it seems like common sense to read every detail so you don't end up costing yourself much more time, like when Lori had to climb back down a mountain in season 6 because she'd forgotten her "frickin' ticket."

After the Roadblock, teams had to go to the MegaZip Adventure Park and ride a giant zip-line to their next clue, which told them to cross town and get to the Pit Stop. This challenge seemed pointless; other than showing us some nice Singaporean scenery, it served no real purpose other than to waste time. The Models did this quickly, then checked in second.

Despite finishing the Roadblock at roughly the same time, the Cowboys finished the leg apparently way ahead of the Detectives because the Detectives couldn't get a cab to the MegaZip Park (despite trying very hard to steal Carol and Brandy's cab). They ended up paying another woman $20 to give up her cab so they could take it. Jet and Cord interestingly didn't wear their cowboy hats on the zip-line; being as Jet wore his to go bungee jumping earlier in the season, it just seemed odd that they wouldn't wear them now. Maybe the Park attendants wouldn't allow it or something. They checked in third, telling Phil that the Drumming Detour was the most difficult part for them, as the "closest thing we use to an instrument is the radio." Classic Cowboys.

At the Ice Cream Detour, Brandy complained that she didn't want to set up in the sun because it was too hot, even though they had a giant goddamn umbrella that they were supposed to put up over them. Seriously Princess, a little sun isn't going to kill you. Brandy dropped her knife into the garbage can, then casually dipped it in some water and continued to make ice cream sandwiches with it, which is fucking gross, and I kept hoping someone would call her on it, as there were people all around her when it happened. The editors tried to infuse some drama by making it seem like there was a really close foot race between the Detectives and the Lesbians, but they were clearly pretty far apart, so the drama didn't work. The Lesbians were eliminated, and Brandy immediately started bitching (again) about how stupid Brent and Caite were for U-Turning them.

I'll be honest, I was ecstatic to see Carol and Brandy finally leave. From the beginning, they (particularly Brandy) have been one of the most negative teams I've ever seen on the show. They bickered constantly when things weren't going perfectly, and when another team did something to irritate them, they became downright mean-spirited and cruel, saying a lot of really unnecessary garbage that just made them come across as ignorant and spiteful. Upon elimination, most teams, regardless of their arguments leading up to their elimination, spend time complimenting their partners and saying how much fun they've had on the Race. Carol and Brandy opted to spend more time complaining about being U-Turned and slinging petty insults toward Brent and Caite (although they always make sure to do it behind their backs). Even the way Brandy walks is negative; after being U-Turned she started stomping around with her shoulders slumped like a goddamn two-year-old. You look to be in your thirties; it's time to grow up, ladies.

I'll also mention that the Brothers are really growing on me. They were a really annoying team earlier in the season, with their bickering and their nonstop use of the word "Bro," but they've apparently gotten past that, and are now pretty constantly supportive of each other (although they're still calling each other "Bro," which gets really old really quickly). We're down to the final 4 now; based on the previews I'm pretty sure there's not an episode next week, and then there'll be 2 more episodes. The season finale will probably be in 3 weeks. Should be good stuff.

Standings

1. Dan and Jordan (Brothers)
2. Brent and Caite (Dating Models)
3. Jet and Cord (Brothers/Cowboys)
4. Louie and Michael (Detectives)

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